Its weigh in day again! With this tough week, I thought for sure I was off track and was going to end up with a crappy weigh in. To my surprise and delight, I lost another 3.6lbs! This is wonderful! I’ve been feeling guilty about the weekend allllllll week, so it is nice that I was able to push through and keep myself on track, regardless of the feelings that I’ve had about this whole process. I have plans to go to the grocery store tomorrow and I’m gonna get a bunch of new things to try that will hopefully kick-start my habits and help me feel satisfied by what I’m eating again. As of right now, I weigh 256.0 lbs; two pounds away from my first goal, 254, which would be 10% of my body weight lost! I’m excited that next week I will probably hit this goal, which will be around 28-29 lbs in eight weeks! I feel like it will be the perfect positive reinforcement for me to continue with my journey.
Sometimes in therapy, we ask our clients the question, ‘Why are you here?’ when they aren’t fully participating in treatment or they sound like they are getting complacent. I want to check in on some reasons that I want to continue, not because I feel like I’ve finished, but because I want to help refresh myself. Obviously, all of the health reasons that I talked about before are important; I want babies in the next few years, I want to be able to participate in activities that require walking/hiking, and I want to live a long life with my amazing husband. As it turns out, I think it will help me to have a few short-term reasons for continuing, because sometimes the bigger picture is hard to lose sight of in the moment.
So, I have a few ‘events’ coming up that I’d also like to continue for. This is the beginning of April, and I have plans for three different weekends this month. First, Easter Sunday is in two weeks and I’m going home-home with Jared to spend the weekend with his family. They live like 5 hours away, so we don’t get to see them very much. When I first met them, I was at a fairly healthy weight, probably around 200lbs. Over the last few years with him, I’ve gained a considerable amount (at least 80 lbs), and so they’ve seen me both at my smallest (4 years ago), and at my largest (December this year). I want to look better than I did then, because they are all petite and I feel super sized around them. Jared has his mom’s body, and is quite petite like her, so picture him, in a female body, and multiply by 4. That is a very petite army of women who are all dwarfed by me (a big fat cow). Anyways, you can see my frustration. SO, in two more weeks, I will have lost just over 30lbs, so I expect that they will be able to notice that I’m a little smaller than I was at Christmas. I’m trying to convince myself that if they don’t notice, I wont be disappointed, but you know how that goes…
The Gun Raffle is the next weekend, and it goes on at Limestone Firehall, an event that I have volunteered at for probably the last 10-15 years of my life. Because I practically grew up there, it will be nice to feel a little more confident in myself when I’m there (I’m also hoping to get a few compliments… god I’m turning very narcissistic ).
Finally, the weekend after that, I’m going to Miami with Jared for the weekend to meet up with my older brother. Obviously, I’m not going to look great in a swimming suit, but I’m hoping to fit into some shorts without feeling totally uncomfortable, and I want to look half-decent in a sundress. Because we’re only going to be down there for like 2.5 days, I’m just going to bring a backpack, meaning I’ll only have a few outfits. I want to bring some sun dresses that I have that I wore on my honeymoon, and I think I was about 240ish pounds then (or possibly even heavier).
I’m looking forward to feeling good in those outfits again, especially because summer is coming and I LOVE sundresses. Who knew I’d grow up to be such a girl. So, overall, I have a few upcoming ‘events’ that I want to use as motivation to continue with what I’ve been doing so far.
In other news, I’m doing some research this week to try to find a new program that will help me pick up my speed as I run. I have exactly two weeks of C25k left, and I want to have a good plan in place for when it ends. So far, I’ve been able to continue running for all of the time that I was supposed to, but I know my pace hasn’t been as fast. I need to do some research to find if it is better to just keep running 30 minutes per day when I finish, or if doing some kind of intervals or something will be better. Me thinking about this is probably a way to distract from how scary it is that I’m graduating soon, which is a big old animal creeping up on me, but regardless, it is a nice break… Plus I’m feeling really excited that I can run for 30 minutes, since two months ago, I thought I was gonna die when I did six sets of 1.5 minutes. Its amazing how successful I’ve been in this program, and I really doubted myself. This just goes to show… trust the process!
Since its Saturday and I always post park pics, here are a few of our wonderful time in the mud yesterday! Ava reeeeeally loves the mud…
Okay, I admit it. I’m a nerdy dog-lover. I can’t help it! Even though I hate taking an extra hour to give both dogs a bath after a trip to the park…. I can’t help but take them because they just love it there so much! Ever heard happy wife, happy life? I think its more like happy dogs, happy everyone 🙂